More After Mental Hospitalization

Here I discuss more on what transpired during my hospitalization and afterwards.  Also, current events and such.

After my discharge from the hospital, I was really excited to be back at home.  Surprised that the doctors released me so soon – I almost did not believe it until the end.

What I noticed was that I had difficulty balancing myself going on stairs.  Probably because there were none in hospital, I thought.  But three weeks and this issue.  So that remains as curious point for me with this.  It resolved within a day or two – and I was able to avoid falling.

I got back to my usual routine but now I attend psychiatric counseling, something I was able to avoid since 2017.  It is a necessity after an event like the one that I had.

Dental Work

A few days ago, as I was chewing, a dental crown fell off.  This was not the first time, but it was the first time for this crown.

I called the dentist, and they were in the process of closing: it was late Friday.  The next appointment they could get me in would be Tuesday.  I decided to go with them. 

Generally, in an event like this, it is urgent to get it put back on as soon as possible.  The exposed tooth is very vulnerable.

This particular tooth has some history.  If I recall correctly and I am pretty sure of this, when I was in Texas and having dental work, my dentist indicated that that tooth needed a crown.  I was a little surprised.  It had given me no problems.  However, I agreed with her advice.

I have the procedure where they place a temporary crown and wait for the final one to come in. 

When it comes in, I am with the dentist ready to have it installed, there is a problem.  She comes to me and says this crown has a red spot on it.  I ask her maybe it is superficial.  “No” she responds, “it does not come off”.  She suggests that we send it back and wait for a new one.

Next time, I believe there was another problem and we had to wait for a third one.

The third one did not fit well.  I had to have the upper tooth grinded down to fit this one.  But it was in, and the interference fit eventually went away.

Over the years, this crown developed a small hole in it.  I must have been chewing on something hard, like toasted almonds and it fractured a small piece in the center of the tooth, I thought.  So, I stopped getting toasted almonds.  The opening exposed the core metal of the crown.

So, recently this crown just came off.

I am at the dentist.  He inspects the exposed tooth and indicates that it has a cavity.  This means that the tooth needs work and the crown needs to be replaced.  I have the crown cemented back on and later schedule a replacement in a few months.

At the dentist, I hear a voice, I believe it is Carny.

“This is what lost the ship”.  She is referring to the crown.  Not impossible, I think.  Maybe it was premeditated by some entities. 

The ship she is referring to, is what I suspect that I was in during the hospitalization.  If I am correct, I was somehow seamlessly transferred unto a Navy’s 1 km long spaceship.  They have a few of these in their secret space program.  With technology obtained from more advanced ETs.

The spaceships that I know the Navy has are motherships.  They patrol the solar system as the Solar Warden.  I have the books to refer to that goes into detail about this, but I am choosing to avoid them for now.

The reason that I don’t really regret this, if this is true this spaceship probably costs as much, if not more as an aircraft carrier, is because they were trying to hurt me.

The Navy is a positive group.  They are referred to as being truly for America and are for its interests – from a positive side.  I believe that I am negative – so that makes us enemies.

Somehow, I made it out of that spaceship intact.  It very easily could not have been.  Did some entity foresee this and had this crown challenge them?  Could it have damaged a huge spaceship?  There are various fields in any such craft.  I don’t doubt that some strange substance could affect the working of one.

There is another theory and can explain it in simpler sense.  However, I am not really sure on this.

I believe that I am a starseed.  That is, I didn’t always incarnate on Earth, I generally incarnate on another planet.  I came here for a temporary mission.  Elon Musk is also who I think is a starseed.

What if, the crown or some other implant, (like what the security guards were detecting in me) was really a tracker.

When I saw (go back to the previous post for more on this) inside of me looked like a bullet.  I believed that it was the tracker.  Then I realized that I was looking at a bullet – but it could be a spaceship in darkness. 

I proceeded to describe the orientation that I saw this spaceship with my hands.  Was I giving away the ship’s location.

As I was looking at this “bullet”, it occurred to me that maybe this perception was from another spaceship next to the Navy’s one.  Was there another one and did it threaten or damage the Solar Warden’s one that I was on.  This is really more plausible that a simple crown taking down a huge mothership.

I see news events that seem to indicate changes.  Things are going in favor of the Democrats – which I am pleased.  The House Republicans are fuming over the deals with the 2024 budget which they see as surrender.  The second Speaker of the House is in danger of losing his job – something that I was told we are for.

Why am I here and what is my mission?  Is it for humanities interest?  Maybe.  As I have Xed (a term I just made up), maybe I am here for the continuation of humanity.

The positives are strong on anti-abortion.  More lives.  More freedoms with less government.  Are we about to run over an abyss? 

Could we have 10 billion lives on the planet and face an existential crisis where there is no solution out?  Or could we have less and a way through?  A continuation of humanity.  One the other side we can think on the good things again.

Clearly part of my analysis comes from Revelations.  Even with the Antichrist, Christ warned that if the times were not shortened there would be no flesh saved.  But there will be.

More on the Hospitalization

I will go through some events at the hospital that I have not covered in my last post.

This one is more of a confession.

There was one Asian young woman that was pretty much there during the whole time I was.  She is thin and would pace the halls talking to herself.  Pacing is what I did there as well (nice coping technique), and I occasionally talk to myself too.

It occurred to me that the negatives talk to themselves.  The negatives are known as service-to-self type of people (see the Ra material).  Service-to-others are more likely to talk to others – the opposite and positive group.

Well, I had no sexual attraction to her – except for one occasion.  Somewhere in the middle of my stay, I am sitting in the dining room, probably ready for dinner, and she comes around.  I practically see her naked in my mind and sexually attractive – something that I withheld from consummating at that time – at least I thought.  It must not have been.

Because that evening – she has a big meltdown.  Start yelling in the hallway.  I am in a nearby room.  They tell her to go to her room since she is yelling.  She does and starts yelling there “I am fucked!” “I am so fucked!” Slams the door.

I start to believe that I maybe the guilty one here.

She has more outbursts later and eventually is banned from eating in the dining room. 

I felt sorry for her.  I am sure I was the cause – albeit really hidden.

The Way Out

Early in my stay, it seemed they were ready to discharge me.  Previously, the doctor and nurses would ask me if I heard voices?  I would reply with a no.

A lie that I felt was necessary to get out of the hospital.

The week that they were ready to discharge me, the doctor tried a different question. “What was the last time you heard voices?”

With this one I decided that going deeper into lying was not the solution.  I eventually told them that I hear voices and see things.

That extended my stay. 

I really felt that I was not going to be let out soon and was headed for the long-term psychiatric facility again.  This is what happened the last time I was there.

The Vision

As I am pacing the hall, I take a break and close my eyes while being next to a wall.  I start seeing this vision. 

I see a wall – this wall is the wall that is separating the hospital from the parking garage.  It has an opening – and it is the shape of a large keyhole that anyone can walk through into the parking garage. 

Then I see a star map – just a pattern of yellow dots.  Then it is over.

This is similar type of vision that I had in the ambulance – something that was new to me.  The star map was really bright and clear.

Why was I having these visions?  Back in the hell room at the hospital that was probably in the spaceship, I flipped one of these visions.  Behind it was a black ball. Or was it a camera?

Was facing a camera and closing my eyes generating these visions?  Was there a camera in the ambulance?

I was facing a ward camera as I closed my eyes this time.

So, I tried to analyze what I saw.  It seemed that the key out of here was in the star map.  Maybe some planet had the key to get out of this place.

I knew that ETs could tell what planet one was looking from just by giving them the star pattern that a person saw.

Hmmm, there is nothing that I can do here. 

However, after a few days, I started to think a little more deeply on this vision.

Did the wall to the garage have a secret to get out of this prison psych ward?

I went down the hall to the end. Beyond this would be the garage. 

The door had a small window.  As I looked through it a light on the other side turned on.  There was a stairwell on the other side.

The light turning on surprised me.  Apparently, there was a motion detector at the stairwell.  From the ward, on the other side of the always locked door, I could activate a light.  The light would turn off within a minute or two.

I could turn a light on and off.  I was influencing something across the fence. Was this my ticket out of here? 

As I would pace across the hall, past the nurse’s station to the next hall, when I came back, the light would be off, and I would try to trigger it again.  The opposite side had the same setup with another motion activated stairwell light.

It felt good to channel my energy to get out of here.  Occasionally, other people would trigger it.  Toward the end, I think the nurses started to stand in front of the door – increasingly.

Not before something happened though.  Once, after triggering the light, I saw like one big and at least one small bubble of black and what felt like night air.  It was nighttime at that time.

Did I succeed in breaking out and getting a bubble of fresh air?

This ward was sealed.  There were no outside activities.  No fresh air to breath or “raw” sunlight to see outside (through windows is not the same).

At some point I realized that this is not a small problem.  No being outdoors for a long time is not healthy.  It seemed as if there was no solution to this.

Perhaps of me, or just another person was having a same problem.  Once a young woman was having a panic attack and was yelling “let me stick my head outside – PLEASE!” over and over.

Reality

I am still questioning where I am.  Did I die through this period?  Or am I in the fourth dimension? 

Time after time, thinking that I have been harvested and am in the fourth dimension is getting a boost.

In the ward, after I came in from General Hospital – and the purported spaceship experience, there was a picture that startled me.

Before I went to the psych ward, I was at the General Hospital overnight, and the place that I suspect I was in the spaceship. 

The spaceship was surrounded by darkness – if it was in space, I would have expected stars.  So, I theorized that it may have been in the inner earth and in a petroleum field.

After being transferred to a different hospital for the psych treatment there was a picture in a dining room that looked like an ocean with a piece of land going out into it.  It looked okay.

Except once, I got near it and things looked different.  The water was dark.  It looked like petroleum.  Further, later the piece of land going into the water looked like a submarine.

What are the odds that I am thinking of a submarine type of craft in petroleum and seeing a picture of it a few days later?

Makes you question your reality.

Was I harvested in the already harvested corn field that day?  Is this what the fourth dimension is really like?  Ra never went into too much detail about it.  Some occurrences from people occasionally rejuvenate this theory.

Finally, during the hospitalization I suspected that I came from the fifth dimension.  After all, I believe that I was in the fifth dimension on the ship and felt really good – maybe that was my ideal state.  This would help in this life because –

In the psych ward, I came across a book titled: “The Medicine Woman”.  It was a really interesting read – but I never finished it.

There was a quote that remained with me.

“Problems cannot be solved on the level they are born”

Third dimensional problems cannot be solved in the third dimension, you have to be from above to do that.

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