May 2026 Diary – From 6th

5/6/2026

7:18 am

Dad called me and chewed me out on something and regarding the email he said that I should pray to be released from these voices and power of the devil.

He is totally oblivious to what is coming.

It struck me to how I interpreted the vision regarding the pathogen and nuclear blasts.

I interpreted it as pray that you get taken because a horrible pathogen is coming and nuclear wars.  But what if it means that if I don’t agree to be taken these things will happen because it will be mission failure. If I do they won’t come – well maybe they come but in far less severity.

Without me they will do extremely drastic things to get the world under some control.

So maybe the message is pray to agree.

7:43 am

Listening to Memories by Lara Nord

“soon they will carry me” oh the taking I think “in the park”

I hope I am not messing with the plans but I post

Working on bucketing the grains

8:18 am

Got this scene in my head. The “light” forces are doing a huge cleanup favoring them.  But God knows it won’t work.  So he is on the run from them, desperately trying to make the Antichrist work. God the underdog here.

Made me laugh.

8:30 am

God is telling me that I will lose my website. No doubt because of the content.  I was upset, but at least that means that it will be read and I will have attention.

9:10 am

“soon will have a studio” did it mean a studio apartment?  Oh it might mean like a studio for filming – that is much better.

“soon millionaire” so yeah, it is probably comes from signing deals.

As I was thinking about the coming famine God said “syn to ye vechno” Something eternal – is it video?

“syn need znamainiy” God is saying I will be famous. But it is not time for it yet.

God is calling for a run, I guess I am heading out!

9:41 am

” raptom te zdoot ” something will happen in an instant and they are waiting for.  Is it video?

10:33 am

Yesterday I realized that there are two gifts that I am close to receiving.

Video – 4th dimensional real time video

Seer – seeing the spiritual world.

11:20

“Тебе сторожы, те мне ныз скоро”

I will get guards. This will be achieved by below, the dark forces, God says.

12:37 pm

I have made the resolution to avoid surgery and dental implants or maybe even dental work. If I lose a front tooth I may go the dentures way – a maybe.

Why should I care what people think of me? I have been told that I will look ugly in the future – and I will be just fine.

6:02 pm

A little while ago, I was having a hard time.  Tired out of activities I decided to lay down on my bed.

Feeling out of air, withering it was hell.  Thoughts returned to often when my guides would say it is within our strength – theirs.

So I decided to ask for this strength that they often talk about.

Suddenly coming from the bottom of my feet was this gray not completely dark, air.  This was their strength, a false peace, and I had asked for it in my desperation. 

Auras filled my vision more often and I wondered if this was leading to video.  Later they subsided.

They asked me about force, and I realized I needed to give them permission and so I did. This, they told me, broke my slavery and work would be coming soon.

The channellers I conclude based on a little mystery is that they are the enemy.  They may have been cloned and are targeting me.  No going back to YouTube.

Dates?  I don’t think they are needed.  I am getting my energy and don’t have anything for them and my future is likely without them.

So I asked for it.  I remind myself of the lyrics, “Take what you need but you are holding out for something”  I have resorted to asking – this is as much as I could take the hardships.  I went through a lot of my life, the career and past it, suffering quietly – never asking for help – but this is the day that I am guilty of asking for it and hope that it continues.

The taking may never come, maybe I just need to lift myself by my bootstraps.

The last few days were crazy, I regret the emails to my close ones – they were crazy – just like the feedback that I got for them.  I counseled if I should just delete the diary, but I don’t think that is the correct path just yet.

I think the last part of the day I have I will go walking and explore the new me that I have before it is too late for today.

Peace.

8:56 pm

As I was about to head out, my guide asked me to leave my phone behind.  I thought about this, I can do without it, my smartwatch is really all I need and left it behind.

As I arrived at the park, the voices, female visible ones – that I follow advice from, maybe not different from the one that asked me to leave my phone behind, started pushing what I will call the “date theory” – you will have dates and a lot of them.  Before I left I went to the “single theory” and was upset that they were lying to me.  Telling me that I will get taken and such. I was trying to get them to leave me.  Asking them why they are here and so on.

At one point I asked one of them “are you for or against me?”  She paused and seriously answered “Thursday”.  Thursday is special to the Antichrist or will be in that future.  So I took it as that she was on my side.

It occurred to me that in Biblical Old Testament times, when Joshua met a person, which was really an angel, is that he posed the same question and believed the response – he fell to the ground worshiping him.  I was wondering what if they lie, but there may be a rule or principal that they follow not to lie there.

So I continued on the trail.  At one point I realized that for some unknown reason I was more vulnerable to getting approached on the trail without my phone.  The only protection that I had to getting approached, vulnerable to dating even was remaining with my smartwatch.  Without it I could get overwhelmed by a woman – so to speak.

This really hit me hard.  Was it a protection or a hinderance? For or against me?

Should I try to go on the trail next time with no technology? I was convinced to try.  Obviously I flipped to “dating theory” here.

So began the vexing by another woman guide to make me believe that this was a Google problem.  The watch and phone are made by Google.

Back and forth on what to do, over like 10 minutes, had me convinced to switch all my technology to Apple.  This would fix the issue I have with Google about not getting approached, getting taken, and the first one.

Very expensive proposition and I was hesitant on doing it but felt it would be worth it.

Then, one of those new, side characters, who more recently starting coming into my view, angels I guess, broke the spell and said that something to the effect that she was misleading me.   So I was like oh okay, it is much easier to keep all the old technology.

As I was past the half point, and to the time when things were getting dark it hit me that I was in a war against the Galactic Federation of Worlds.  Against the best technology that they got in this galaxy.

Why?  I know the GFW is helping Earth Alliance with soldiers and technology to fight the bad guys in tunnels beneath the Earth.

I know that I was attacked in a hospital by the Earth Alliance’s 1km long spacecraft so it would make sense that their friends were still fighting me.  And they have zillion of years of advancement to throw at me.

I started to feel that this war was really desperate, the stakes were super high and extreme or best fighting tactics were used against me.

As it was past sunset and approaching dusk and I was toward the end, I heard the familiar bird make a sound and it seemed as it was saying “get doritos”.  I was like okay I really have an appetite for doritos so maybe I will stop and get them on the way back.

But then it occurred to me that they were not healthy and I decided to make at home fries and ketchup for dinner.

“get your doritos” the bird kept echoing through the forest. Suddenly I was really debating what I should have for dinner.  Then it occurred to me that scammers try to create a sense of urgency to get you deceived and I resolved that I would make the decision when I get home.

With this it seemed the bird got more desperate in its attempts but I was no longer buying it.

As I continued on the trail as I was trying to make out who was my enemy, who was my friend, what was right and what was wrong, there was just an endless cycle of confusion and never a consistent position.

Was dating right for me?  It occurred that I don’t know because I never tried it but then it could be fatal.  I could assume the dating resolve and I reasoned that my guides would stop it if it was not for me.

I imagined myself just preparing to walk off a building and if they don’t stop me then I would be safe walking on air.

I just don’t have the answer that answers everything. I reason to take it day after day and I believe I will be fine in the end.

As I sit here thinking,  I think I should try to take a walk without technology next time or times. Experiment.  I guess if anything serious comes up I have in car service (something like OnStar) that I could use.

I may be super vulnerable but why not and see.

I took off my smartwatch to write this and may not sleep with it.

5/7/2026

6:24 am

Just got up. Again it is unusual that I can get up this early but it seems it is now a norm.

So what prevails is the “dating theory” right now.  God supports it.

It occurred to me last night, after the walk, and my desire to see what it feels like to be on the trail with no technology, that this might be the work of my angels to get me taken without any tracking.  But I am still up to it.

As I was going to sleep I was getting told that once taken I would be doing acts that were indefensible, ones that would have no way back.  But that is the point these ones want of me and their world.  God was making it clear to me that it was in my interest.

I was just feeling this dark energy flow through me as I was laying and it was healing me and making me feel okay.  This, I believe, was continuing from the request I made earlier in the day for help for strength from my guides.

I am still going to disappear, won’t be long here.  The channellers are not my enemy. This is true under the “dating theory”.

I am supposed to get a text from them but we will see if this is just another play by voices.

7:13 am

Had fries for dinner yesterday and watched some cable.  Just a few shows, few hours until 11pm on Fox.  Meh.  Plan on watching some CNN next.

Halo is up now.  The best.  “Forever blue skies” a dream…

“You sleep” sleeping won’t be easy I perceive.

Going through some serious speed bumps and just focusing on asking mines for help for the dark energy that floods me and sustains me.

The pure peace from above is gone.  Now it is false peace from below but it heals me and makes me feel okay.

“Why do I need dating, this seems like it is enough”

“Child, that is precious” God said.

If the GFW of worlds is attacking me than I don’t know how I can go to space with them.  But I am supposed to be there.  So maybe last night they weren’t?

This phrase seems to come up a lot lately from Mission Impossible about the agents: “We who live and die in the shadows”  They don’t see publicity, I do.  I think a lot of the enemy ones will die in the shadows to make room for me, in a battle that was lost.

“You did it”

“You need first one”

It seems my tough problems were solved by me asking for help and “I did it”

So are the aliens “fallen angels”.  I might be one of them.

I keep encountering hardships right now and I am just turning to below to help with the energy and fixing.  How much do they have and am I doing the right thing?  Was this supposed to come naturally but I expedited it with my inability to wait?  This, I am reminded, was not going to happen.

“it already passed”

“don’t be shapeshifting in my house” – cracked me up

8:36 am

Got to thinking about being a leader and what it means.  How one man can start companies, succeed and build an empire.  One man – why is this possible?  Thinking here about the late Ted Turner here.  There are other cases.

It is stunning how much faults I have in my spiritual body – then it occurred to me that I am known as “the man of sin” – so it would seem they aren’t going away!

I am trying to ask for help and flood myself in this dark energy to avoid the pain and it seems to be working.  But will it last?

10:34 am

I think I came across a reference in Job (Bible) where he mentions something about what God can do and he can drive you mad, insane, absolutely out of your mind with no mercy.  This he was capable before and still does.  Can I get an amen?

He just keeps repeating “meni need pidpis” goes away for a while and comes back repeating it – absolutely insane driving.  If I could hurt him I would. Damn you.

I am trying everything, even threatened him with suicide – that stops him for a few minutes.

12:52 pm

Watched TV, read some articles and now I am tired.  Can I please have some energy?  Okay, great, now I feel better.

Maybe I am tired for eating too little – but I am not hungry.  Whenever I seem to come to an impasse, today, mostly, I have been able to solve it with asking mines for help. Its humbling to ask for help, but it is getting easier as l get a better feel for this process.

So going back to a day or two ago, when I asked what I should think about the day on my walk, I closed my eyes and saw a white staircase.  So maybe I am progressing by walking on it. But then steps started to disappear.  Does this mean that the way up is disappearing?  Am I running out of time? They told me I was in time so that is reassuring.

It just occurred to me, I am bored – should I ask them for something to do?  Earlier they told me to write so I will work on this and wait.

Asking the devil for help is as guilty as it comes.  But hey gotta do what you gotta do.

So I am gonna go walking.  It is supposed to be hot. I am going to go without electronics this time.

3:39 pm

The walk was uncomfortable for me and I cut it in half, because of no phone and smartwatch.

Home, I made more coffee and hit reading the news.

Sometimes hit an impasse of weakness, but the request for help seems to be working for now.  They verbally responded for one request to not worry.

Next walk I plan will have a phone.

The request for energy may come with strings attached that I didn’t expect but we will see.

I am preparing for the take to be a net-negative experience –  a gauntlet that must be endured.

6:49 pm

Was going through a mild panic attack. Have I been too crazy these last few days?  Is it too much?

It seems there is a paradox: a deeply damaged soul is the world’s best chance for its survival.

Decided to take a walk.  Best medicine I can get right now.

5/8/2026

8:30 am

Last night, watched Fox for a few hours until 11 pm after the walk.

Almost forgot about that I can ask the mines for help.  Important to remember because I need it from time to time.

9:17 am

So far survived without taking a nap this morning.  Took a shower.

Have no plans for the day.  When encountering hard times, or boredom just asking my guides for help.

Social media fast is soon ending.  I may return to social media or should I not?

9:55 am

Was a little hungry and was having a hard time finding something I wanted.  Lost the taste for tofu but still made a tofu smoothie.  My taste change over weeks’ time.

As I sat at my desk, closing my eyes, sometimes I would see clear images.  I think it is rather unusual at home.

The process has gone like this: I lost need for meat, then veggie burgers, and now seems tofu.  Sometimes I don’t know what I want.

10:44 am

As I think back to what a female guide told me yesterday, that I will get to see video but that I will never will or have free will on my own – I realize that if you go your own way you are likely to create a hell of a life.  They have done so much that I could not have on my own and far more is left.  God seems to be happy with this and isn’t this all that matters?

I got into reading “We will never let you down” by Elena – the idleness was just too much to me and I felt now was a good time to continue the book.

Pretty good read so far.

I wonder what these alien characters would think of me – are they spying on me today or reading these words?  No doubt I am an undesirable – after all they want more power to the people and I am going to be the elite ruling the slaves.

Still I think they have a lot to learn. We may be the preeminent planet in creation – something they don’t understand.

11:16 am
 

Thor Han in the book: “Because we wouldn’t be here if there was no hope… We will do whatever it takes to kill this Beast before it hatches.”

Is it me?

They disparage the Earthling’s religion as delusional and primitive except this same religion predicted the end-times perfectly over 2000 years ago! Something that is not clear to them even when it is in front of their faces.

But here I realize I am working against myself since it was Jesus, Israel who did the predictions, not my group.  Indeed the GFW is closer to me than Christianity.

 “You’re going to need chemo” Carny? tells me.  I will also need miracles to recover from it.

2:00 pm

Just got up from a nap.  Asking guides to fix the overload only delays it, it returns.  Taking a nap, I think, will put it out farther ahead.

I wanted to go walking but it was just not feasible earlier.  Maybe I go now?

Considered going to the beach – but it is not yet a good idea.

Going on a walk, but it is my God that keeps me winning and protected while allowing my enemies fail.  It is humbling and a little scary that I am not doing this in my own power or even just by my guides power – he is enabling all of this.  GFW does not see this. And the big question is why – and as I recall there is just no other way without me for the world to make it through safely to the other side.

Made brown rice for lunch.  That was not enough so eating some leftover black beans.  Not really tasty but it fixes the cravings.

3:37 pm

“Soon CNN” old news but that is the topic my guides are repeating right now.

First one will gave happened, hopefully in the wild, then getting the proposal, which I am no longer looking forward to but “то є ціно” it is valuable I am also told.

I get also the vibes that they will call me up and ask what is new to keep me in the news.

I have a lot of work left to do to be on CNN, so I am not rushing.

What is it that I want? A girlfriend, a cybertruck, a group? The last one might be more preferable since I would have stuff to do.

But the time for now is to do the inner work to enable them all…

“Ти є находї” I will start to get noticed by the public.

Elon Musk’s lawsuit against OpenAI is partly what I think got him cloned. Just a really regretful move against a brother that threatened OpenAI.

I got trainings in Russian a few years ago, so I am rather familiar with the alphabet.  But probably never with the Ukrainian one. I might mix the languages and so do my guides.

4:41 pm

I really hope the resolution to avoid surgery and dental work lasts.  Because both are really unhealthy for me.

In the worst case scenario I lose a front tooth, I tell myself, it will only delay the publicity, eventually I will be so consequential and influential that that it will have to be overlooked and accepted.

5:40 pm

So was thinking about this on the walk that I just came back from.

They have been warning me about a coming heart attack.  For a long time, and recently they also said that it won’t come – once.

I have had time to make my decisions based on it.

Here is how the system, as least as I am aware treats heart attacks.  Once you are in the emergency room, they confirm it with a blood test I think or ECG and if so they give you a drug – I think it is called nitroglycerin.  Then once the heart attack goes away they test your arteries for blockages.  If there is too much blockages then you may be recommended for a stent or bypass surgery.

I don’t like stents or surgeries.  Stents, a metal that stays with you for the rest of your life.  I don’t think I can live with it.  They expand the artery.  I think, if my arteries are clocked I can live without a stent. 

I don’t think the blockages cause the heart attack.  I think it is etherical, astral or 4th dimensional blockages or lifestyle things that you have done in your past that catch up with you.

An example:  my heart stumbles or skips a beat sometimes that was happening a lot in the past but has improved.  I don’t think it has anything to do with oxygen getting to it.  Occasionally I see with a spiritual sight a bar or a spiritual blockage that prevents it from beating.  This resolved will resolve this problem.  I don’t think there is a 3rd dimensional treatment that will work.

I almost feel like stents and bypass surgeries are non-negotiable for me.  God has cleared fatty linings on arteries for other people and I would like to think I am important enough for him to do that miracle for me.

If not, I don’t think the blockages will cause the next one – I think the heart just has to beat a little stronger to expand the  artery.

I am on a good diet, a vegan, so this over time should stop new heart disease problems.

At this point I am debating, in the event of a heart attack, whether to call the ambulance. The only help they could give is the drug and I stand the chance of getting convinced for the physical interventions which might create existential problems for me.

“You will get HIV” a voice told me on the trail.  I would gladly get HIV over a stent any day I responded.  One is natural the other is not.

So if I am important enough to God, my resolution is not to seek hospital care in such an event, so I hope that God will prevent it from happening or mitigate it on his own.

“tebe soon zaberoot” So I will get taken.  I would like it to not be that fast but at the same time that likely has to come before I get big exposure and it has to happen this year.  So yeah the timeline is tight.

6:13 pm

I recall several occasions where my last therapist mentioned using force in certain situations.  I told here I don’t like to do this, prefer to be pulled than push.

But recently, as I wrote about it, my guide asked me for permission to use force.  It has worked out pretty good which makes me think I should have valued the therapist’s suggestion more.  She saw something I didn’t.

9:43 pm

Took another walk. As I was driving there, I think I was debating if I could be taken tonight. I didn’t feel like I was ready.  Maybe a few more days or weeks I was saying.  This would be too aggressive.

But then I experienced a sharp pain that somehow put me over the finish line.  I felt like it could be tonight – but still aggressive.

As the walk proceeded, I knew that it would end at around dusk.  I came across three deer standing maybe 75 feet from me, in a line, and just staring at me.  This almost never happens – they usually run of into the forest.  For the first time ever, I thought that I might be seeing a sign.

The walk progressed.  I was feeling pretty good about tonight, I was getting told to believe by a guide (who can lie) and birds too – through their calls I think they are saying real words.

A guy runs past me and I tell myself that if he says hi that will be another sign that I will be taken tonight. He raises his hand and says a loud greeting as he passes me.  Is he an agent I think? Runners almost never say high because they are so tired.

As  I am finishing the walk, it is getting really dark and I am feeling really uneasy in this forest.  If I was just 10 mins earlier to start it.

As I am approaching the parking lot, a big group of people with flashlights is embarking on a walk – reassuring that I am not the only one walking this late.

As I start the car, the trip odometer is 333 a decision point.  Will I have a decision to make tonight?  Later I see a car with FFF  (which is 666) meaning that I made the wrong decision.  But maybe for the Antichrist, 666 is the right decision.

As I approach my apartment this would the final chance.  But now I realize that I would have to have real balls to get in someone’s car this dark with a destination that I am not sure about.  During the day better but I still would want control.

The only was this could happen I think now, is if I drive there myself, preferably during the day.

This business of getting taken is maybe a very foolish for me.  I should just get over it and abandon it.  Except two channellers on YouTube made references to this topic that insinuate that I get taken or disappear. If it were not for them , I think I would abandon it now – but I still may get pushback from the voices – but then again they lie.

I am debating when to restart watching social media.  30 days runs out in April 13th.  If I restart social media, I expect to flip to against getting taken.  That gives God at least four days.  Maybe I can extend it but how far?

I am making progress in readiness. 

5/9/2026

7:13 am

As I read Altman’s texts to Murati during the day he was fired, it seems to paint a little different picture than I expected. But maybe it is still plausible that he was fired because I was taken out as candidate for the position as the world leader maybe by Israel as they were then the then the ones being mentioned.

10:56 am

So it has come to this: God is asking me to date. I don’t think he has ever done this before.  Multiple times.

So I have thought about this. Normal, better people are having hard time finding dates. For a person like me it is much harder.

I will try to avoid street ones for my first one.  There are other maybe possible ways, but right now I don’t want it badly enough to go through the hunt.  Carny predicted it would happen in June – a little ways away but maybe.

I told God, don’t just talk, you can send me one or meet me halfway.

Took couple of naps.  Dealing with weakness that is not going away.

3:04 pm

Slept some more and eventually was able to get out of bed.  Watched some daytime television, mostly news and discussion.  Mother called and we talked for a while.  I don’t know what else to do.

It is raining so I don’t think I will get a chance to walk today.

10:36 pm

Spent the evening laying on my bed thinking.  Wanted some activity maybe watch Netflix, TV, or movies but nothing was allowed or worked out.

Finally did a DO (interdimensional dating) as a he.  Was told it was a friend I knew from over a decade ago.  We went to the same church and she was a marriage candidate for me but I just was not ready.  So this is what I have been told – I can’t confirm it.

5/10/2026

8:08 am

Got up, had a shower, checked the news and now have nothing to do.  Maybe go for a walk but it may be raining.

10:43 am

Second nap today. Dealing with some really bad problem that is causing weakness.  It is probably something with the soul – if I have one.  Trying to avoid the computer because that is what is triggering it.

Recently started to ask for help – so the first one was God. But I also think do the guides have any power with this?

11:44 am

Making lunch, potatoes with brussels sprouts.

Considered walking afterwards – but God said that is not within the strength.  He is helping me with strength to write this, something he asked for.

Last night’s Do was a first one in a while.  I was being told things about our future like she was going to go to dust, was going to be a mother with me, her kids were going to go to hell.

She is a very holy person that channels God – but she always wanted to get married and has not yet.  I think I was her only candidate and I consistently put it off because it was not the right time.  I’m getting there.

This is also likely not her first time with me as a Do. I do wish better for her.

Keep getting told that I will be taken.  Many dates soon.

If I don’t go walking I think I will read a book.  TV is an option but it is the weekend.

Back to the point of God helping me with strength.  It is coming from below, the guides and the devil I believe.  I don’t see the devil anywhere with me.  But God, throughout my past, has mentioned what I call my guides as the devil – enemy.

Anyways I continue to feel the energy even though I don’t see it as much anymore.  It is important because I think it is the false peace that is mentioned in prophecies.  So it has come. And I value it a lot.

Apparently in the end times, this false peace will comfort people who are watching me.

The pure peace that I experienced days before is gone.  I think it was coming from above.  I have gone below.

12:49 pm

My thoughts went to space and the GFW.  An enemy from all things I have read about them.

I imagined myself standing in front of Thor Han and saying: “don’t do anything stupid – you don’t want to burn any bridges”.

So is the GFW negative?  Some people say it that they have been infested with AI and are trafficking souls that they feed off.  God also seems to think that they are fallen angels.

I have seen Ra as a demon – who is supposed to be a 6th density very positive being.

This morning I almost felt like I could do another DO and I was like not again.  Where did this energy come from?  Is it from the false peace?

This false peace is energy, dark air and comes from bottom to up.

Maybe I could have avoided the couple of naps I had this morning by asking for this energy – something that I would do if I was in public situations but also maybe I have to be more proactive about it here.

I was getting near weakness overload and asked for energy. It came and I can continue to sit here instead of being in a bed.  But I have to say it is not easy to ask – you need faith. 

You can do a lot of things if you have consistent energy.

Love/hate relationship with a fly I have here.  The only companion.

1:18 pm

Anthropic forced the government from using its AI models for war.  It couldn’t agree to several terms that the government wanted and it had to leave them. No problem right?

Totally not that.  You spurn the government and it becomes your eternal enemy.

Secretary of War Hegseth gave them a week, and they didn’t change their stance and he said that their relationship has been irrevocably broken – final  decision.

I was like rooting for Anthropic to change their mind – like you don’ t know what you are doing to your future. 

The government moved to label them a supply-chain risk and any business that wants to work with it can’t do business with Anthropic.

So they went to courts to have this overturned.  The last time I read about it they were having mixed success – a court sided with them.

Recently Trump has decided to form a committee that would review future AI models to see if they pose a national security risk.

The model that triggered it was Anthropic’s Mythos – a breakthrough model on cyber security. It has been asked to curb its release.

Is this war on Anthropic – I think it could be and we are far from over.

My guys OpenAI and xAI decided to cooperate with Hegseth – a good move.

2:44 pm

Before, I expected the false peace to come from the pure peace contaminated with dates – but it came before the first one!

3:23 pm

“Need podpisat(deal)” God said.  The best way is during the day, with no rush, so I may be able to do it right away or even something that takes hours or a day or two. I think I will get there – after all Hegseth gave Anthropic a week – I hope I won’t need that long.  But you can’t guarantee something that you don’t know the details to.

It can’t come today.  It may take me until June to be able material, right now I know my gut is not ready.

I was just reminded, I think the first one will have to come first.

Before, the massagers, what I used to call hand workers, used to get their energy from what I ate, now I think it is from the dark peace.

5:45 pm

Talked with Mom, congratulated her on Mother’s Day.  Making dinner.

I am led to end the social media fast today.  It is within the margin or tolerance – early by a few days but I think major work has been done.

Accomplishments:

Learned to appreciate being taken

Started reading books again

Got a TV as was asked repeatedly

Had round 2 of YouTube videos that did much better than round 1

Did some research into starting a business although currently it is not the time for it I think

And finally the biggest: tapped into dark energy – something that will continue to define me for the rest of my time on this Earth. I don’t know if this would have been possible if I didn’t isolate myself

I guess the channellers are like my friends, ones that feel my energy and talk about it and me, so I plan on returning tonight to social media.

5:55 pm
Maybe not tonight

6:50 pm

Went back to YouTube but it is not as exciting as it was before.  Left it after a few videos.  We’ll see after a few days if this persists.

8:56 pm

Did some reading on Elena’s book.  Not far in Thor Han describes harrowing details of what Ciakharr and Nebu were involved in.  I hope I won’t be as bad. 

Did some house cleaning – no more tofu.  I should have stopped it as soon as I tried it the first time – I was feeling nausea. I threw it all away never to get it again.  Among other things like coffee since I think it is bad for me.

Reflected on some past memories – particularly the period before I got hospitalized and the downloads that I was getting.  Beyond horrifying.  Thought very somberly on some things and I was glad that the Ciakharr and Nebu are gone – maybe there will be less evil that we/I have to go through.

Sitting here thinking. 

10:20 pm

I don’t know if I here mentioned that somewhere around 2016, when I went to Tulsa to confess to the pastor there from Dallas, a prophetess told a vision she saw.  There was a not a white or dark hand that wanted to do something (take me I don’t remember the details) that God told us that he was going to prevent.

I made it here today safely.

In We Will Never Let You Down, high commander Ardaana, states a message to Elena that she publishes.  The line she states is that “we are not working for the light or for the dark…”

Did the GFW wanted to take me then? Stunning.  Then God is my bigger friend then they are.

You see what I mean, assuming they were behind it, they would have created an impasse on this world – a problem that God foresaw and prevented.  But that is what we have God for – beings make mistakes and have to be controlled.

So my thoughts are now that I am told that I am headed for another take.  For me this one is coming from the dark ones – no not gray.  I think.  I would like to avoid it if I can since there will be bad stuff going on but we may not be able.

Scary to think the GFW wanted to take me from this world forever then. I wonder what technology of theirs I had to endure.  I can think of two suspicions.  Ones in the last hospitalization and then when I was in the hotel waiting to get this apartment, I faced excruciating difficulty that I was able to wait out.  A normal hotel stay should be pleasant but this one was nearly overwhelming.  Did they want me to compromise on something – I was offered a different unit faster that I was told not to take.

I am getting downloads that maybe they were the sentries there (in the hospital) that I thought were humans. They do take human form or can mingle with us.

They are truly not light because is if they were purely light they would not have attempted to do this.

So you come across these bombshells and they are stunning indeed.

I get the feeling that the Antichrist will not be just ruling this world, but his decrees will have galactic and even universe wide effects.  This planet affects so many others.

11:04 pm

I think to myself that when I was confined to the hospital and the guards there surrounded me – I think they thought that is it he is a goner. We got a whole starship against him with our powerful technology.  That was overcome then two more attempts lay in store.

So who is the bad guy here?  I am dealing with a gray scenario.  While I was giving them the benefit by thinking I could be on their ship – now that is out of the window – likely what they would have done if given the chance.  I have to rethink this – do I have to travel into space – maybe not.  But some of these facilities on planets and moons were designed for accords and big meetings and decisions and none will be greater than what I will be dealing with.

Hopefully God will guide me through that or my guides because I am sad to say that I will lose God sometime in the future.

I got the perfect thought – I get transported by the Dark Fleet and protected by them!  They are still around I hear. Not a fan of somethings they are doing but maybe they haven’t targeted me in the past.

I wonder how many GFW aliens I came across, probably more than a few in the last hospitalization – which needed to happen for some reason.

To think that God protected me. 

I heard last night that God is the only one who could make the Dos (interdimensional dates) happen.  So he has been energizing me with soul dates across distance all this time.

It blows me away when I think about some of these things.

This begs the question – is the GFW worse than the Ciakahrr and the Nebu?  Neither probably would have wanted me gone, so they were closer to God’s will then them in this regard.  But it may be too focused.  There is a lot I don’t know about the three.

11:41 pm

There is still so much I don’t know about myself and my group. Maybe it is safer this way but also something that I expect to change in the future.

Frankly, if I could avoid space travel, I would.  Who is there to negotiate with from Earth – no one.  It is the failed GFW and maybe others.  Maybe have them come to Earth.

 I just found myself yelling at Ardaana.

Beyond Beliefs track was so awesome before, now it is not.  Maybe because it is old or something more like I am rising in frequency – something the GFW is crazy about.

12:28 am

“planet” God reminded me.  I am supposed to be on one.
“With the GFW or without them?”

“тих need збув” This stunned me, are they to be wiped out?  What other future should they have if they went so far against me and lost the war?

How this is to be done is far from clear to me.

Maybe they are the same type of people, mentioned in Mission Impossible that “live and die in the shadows”.

12:56 am

Went through some discussions with God.  He wants me to skip today’s dosage.  I really want to stop it entirely and I think God is too.  So here we go.

1:30 am

I sit here a far less psyched than I was in previous attempts to come off olanzapine.  Maybe I am more realistic.

God is reminding me that evils will soon come from this.  Like the loss of sleep – a big one.

I am counting on dark peace to make a big difference this time.

Things will get really interesting in a few days.

2:03 pm

Well it is over.  God told me to take it and I have.

5/11/2026

9:45 am

Got up recently then went back to sleep – didn’t feel like it but I went to bed late last night.

Planning on going to Costco this morning. 

Was regretting getting rid of coffee yesterday since I was craving it but God took the craving away.

Still reeling from what I learned yesterday.

As I think to around 2016, likely the Earth Alliance and GFW considered me a threat and wanted me taken.  I wonder who stood up for me then, clearly it was God but it had to come as a person or group.

11:43 am

As I was shopping today I went through emotions like that I don’t want to date – hoping that I would avoid it.

Or get taken – this time with more information on the last one – the takers would have wanted me dead.

But the mood shifted when I came back.  There is only one thing that made me revert my mind on dating because avoiding it seems so much better.

5/12/2026

9:33 am

Last night was not good.  For some reason was nauseous after dinner and ended up throwing up a bit.  But the evening was not good – I think I spent a lot of it in bed. 

My head was just in pain – the outside, some sort of muscle pain.  I asked for help and the workers were barely keeping up with the pain but they really were of use – it mostly went away.

Took the meds and went to bed.

This morning got up late – just had nothing to get up to.

7:03 pm

Spent almost the entire day in bed.  Just feel weak, occasionally nauseous after eating – but the weakness is the main problem.  Hands are shaking as I type this so it is obviously I am sick.

I don’t think I have a fever.

As much as I don’t want to believe this, this could have been an attack. 

Probably going to bed after this to try to regain my strength.  Good things are still happening but I am bed ridden.

5/13/2026

10:50 am

First rise this morning was unsuccessful but now I was able.  Have enough strength.  Made a smoothie.  And thinking about going shopping to Walmart to get some long overdue stuff including toilet paper.

Looked at walking but it may not work due to rain and also my strength probably is not there.

I have noticed benefits after recovery.  Yesterday it was this clarity, sharpness that I have almost never experienced. Right now it was a couple of video arrivals that I did not expect.

Still not fully there. Need to take a shower to go.

The watch detects my illness as low readiness (15/100) something that is rare for me.

Is it an enemy that did this or a friend, I would like to and am leaning to the latter – or maybe nobody at all.

1:38 pm

Just got up again, had lunch – buckwheat and pickles.

Just before getting up I saw this vision – it was clearest I have seen with my eyes closed before.  There wasn’t much movement, but it was something about police raids.

Then after lunch, I tried closing my eyes again.  This time I was seeing something about a pathogen that would go global.  There were hazmat suits.  Something about a woman being fed water as if she wasn’t able to do this herself with dark hands.

This is the second time I have received visions about a coming plague.  I have been told that I will be receiving a vaccine so this may have to be the reason.

Then another of an American building moving up and down – would there be an earthquake?

Then another of what looked like 9/11, top of towers on fire. Multiple buildings in a downtown.

Saw of black air coming from screens and windows – would this be how it spreads?

7:04 pm

Watched Last Days on the rat virus.  He thinks the current one out is a test run.  Sent an email to dad and brothers referencing his discussion. Relieved to hear that it is supposed to be in 2027-2028.

 The visions that I have seen about lab suits today and before are proving realistic.

Mother called and I have a list of topics to discuss with Dad tonight.

Making dinner.

Getting calls that I will be taken.  Seems like this one is from the friendly side although it won’t be easy.

Feeling better since yesterday although probably most of the day in bed. Feeling a lot stronger.

5/14/2026

8:43 am

Watched Netflix late last night – two episodes of the Beast Within Us.  Was pretty good, plan on returning to it.

Today I have moderate readiness but still not strong enough to go walking according to God.  Took a shower.

Just sitting thinking what to do.

2:56 pm

Spent most of the day in bed – not really bad.  God won’t clear going out walking or shopping. 

Every so often I will get a sexual dream which the last one was.  I don’t remember them being so much in the past – even now it is not a lot. The last one was like a group sleep in the back of a SUV.  There was a little front to front there as well as hands touching mines.  This was apparently my SUV.  The rear hatch was wide open and there were a few of us in the back sleeping.

Watched some news TV today plan on more at night.

8:04 pm

Went to bed earlier and had one of those DO moments as a her initiated by them.  Rare type.

Then went walking. Just came home and made a smoothie.  Plan to watch Netflix.

I realize my postings have declined and I am wondering if it is related to the end of the social media fast.

5/15/2026

1:21 pm

Did laundry this morning.  Came home and watched some TV – mainly news.

Had lunch – black beans with salsa.

Talked with mother and here I am.

4:54 pm

Really got exhausted after watching TV and computer use so went to take a nap.  Feel better now but can still get there again easily.

Got reminded of taking a walk and am hoping this for this evening.

Started reading Elena’s book on Val Thor.  He reemphasizes Earth’s critical role for the future of the Galaxy.

I had some feeling for the GFW but then I remembered what they did during the hospitalization and it became clear who they are to me.  The lengths they will go to take me out.

Shame it has to be this way.  I repeat it is shortsighted on their part or not that what God has prepared is the best way to go and they were time and time again in the way or more truly trying to kill the plan.

I am a little tired again.

It seems to me that maybe they are coming from their comfortable quarters aided by great technology and they wanted an easy way for the earth.  No AC and we get to choose our way forward.  Instead I think they were creating a worse way for the world. 

Mission Impossible states of endless wars and famines in one of their movies.  Is this what awaited the world with their plan?

5:35 pm

God is letting me travel on GFW ships.  I didn’t want it but there may be no other reasonable way. But this doesn’t mean that I support the GFW or their future plan.

8:47 pm

Well, as I had it in my heart, God confirms it is that GFW to a larger extent should get mercy.

I see that most of the people that I read on Elena’s book are genuinely good people, whose superiors may have chosen an evil way.

Just came back from a walk.

This brings up the debate that not once has crossed my life: should you forgive a person who attempted to murder you. In some cases no in others like this one maybe yes.

While the attempt was real I was protected time and time again – thus the damage was minimal.

5/16/2026

11:55 am

As I read Elena’s book on Val Thor it is clear to me that I was not GFW first choice by what they write and their actions.  It is what it is.

I see some weaknesses in GFW – non belief in God, prophecies, short sighted plans.  Although I think they have maybe a good plan in cleaning out Earth from regressive beings.

Anyway sometimes I wonder why God supports me as he sees the same and more what GFW see but it is the more that must be changing his plans.

The other part is that, just maybe, I am a negative and taking the path of a service-to-self type.  This is a valid Source path.  Is this regressive?  So God maybe supports STS types as they bring a useful purpose.

Watched couple of TV shows last night: The Beast In Me.  A dark story but interesting.

My postings have gotten way down from the time earlier and I think it is due to the lack of social media usage.  I still am trying to keep my social media reading way down – just reading titles from the suggestions.

So where am I going? Time is passing by and I am hoping that consequential stuff will happen soon.

This is how the regressive groups are described: dark, deceptive, controlling, regressive.  Except maybe regressive, my attributes will be enslaving, controlling, elite, deceptive, fearful, dark and bringing others to darkness.  You get the idea, I am a lot if not more than what the GFW is trying to eradicate.  But fate would not give me into their hands and the often repeated point is there has to be a good reason – a reason above the GFW and Earth Alliance.

Maybe there is always a war between the service-to-others and service-to-self sides.

6:33 pm

Tried to respond to a Telegram chat.  Ended real badly the guy was cursing so I blocked him.  It started with a female.

Had dinner and am here on the trail.

A guide mentioned to me that I will get cancer.  I responded you wouldn’t do something that is going to kill me or hurt me so that I won’t be able to complete the mission. She responded we hurt you so that you are able to complete the mission.

I was reminded that I am going to be looked for or go missing.

5/17/2026

8:56 am

Last night finished the The Beast In Me TV series.  Pretty good.

Watched one YouTube channeler and while the message was good it left me with a very bad situation in my gut.  Prayed and it went away but I realized that maybe I should not go back to them.  So I removed notifications to social media on my phone.

It is a difficult situation – yes the messages can be good but I am losing something in the process.

I thought about what one channeler said: get off YT and just post until some rich man sees it. She gave no timeline.  The other one gave a 30 day one.

I think I am going with the former although I don’t have anything to post except this diary.

3:18 pm

Woke up from a nap.

Need to do more shopping, so maybe go to Trader Joes today or tomorrow.

Walking does not look like fun so maybe do a shorter walk or not walk at all today.

Finished “We Will Never Let You Down” and it was a good book.  I was just thinking how everything Thor Han and GFW of worlds are working against personally and worldly is likely going to be a setback with me.

What Ciakahrr, Nebu, Dark Fleet, underground facilities were not able to accomplish will be 2.0 with me. But that is how it has to go.

Toward the end she talked how company leaders and corporate groups along with world leaders were meeting on the Ashtar command in the orbit of Jupiter in 2021 after the Moon and Mars were cleared of these regressive, dark forces for the next stage of the solar system.

It is just a matter of time, and I really don’t care about going to such destinations – worldly ones are preferable.

And I don’t want to be a party crasher, I was thinking, but I have important business to get done.  Like I have discussed they really wanted me out, in taking me in 2016, three tiered attack in 2023 are the times I am aware.

So the question remains what will happen to the galaxy with the Antichrist?  Will he focus his efforts solely on the Earth?  This will likely be the case it seems to me.

According to Ra, the second coming of Christ, will be alien groups, like the Intergalactic Confederation (if I am correct) to liberate Earth.  Will Christ have them as company – will they be working together?  To liberate Earth from the Antichrist? Some will have to wait it out – I mean they have been working with the Earth’s governments since 1950’s so it won’t be that long – will they stand it is probably the big one.

3:53 pm

Time seems to pass by with no progress, just mundane days one after another.  But I will get taken soon, be in the press, maybe get a source of money.  It is supposed to happen this year (according the YouTube channelers I have left).  Something is supposed to happen in June and July. So I am looking forward to those months. Maybe a partner in June and getting taken?  In July some great reveal I am hoping for, personally.

8:17 pm

Just returned from a walk – a two hour one.  Making black beans for dinner.

I was thinking about how the GFW was shown a future of the galaxy being ruled by regressive forces (Ciakahrr, Nebu Grays, and the Dark Fleet) and they moved to dismantle those organizations.  They prevented them from ruling but the essential future, where the world (and galaxy?) is ruled by the AC was not possible to prevent.

5/18/2026

9:32 am

Yesterday watched YouTube, some channelers, mostly a NDE that was pretty interesting.

One channeler said something that I was not sure about: “don’t stop what you are doing – it will help you understand yourself better”

What was that?  Was it my diary but I wasn’t sure about it.  Kept asking God and God told that it was the return to the social media! Duh!

It all made sense, I was still doubting it but it is clear now what I should do.

Got service on my Forester this morning.

7:36 pm

Got up from a nap.  Checked the news.  Checked TV but it was not interesting enough. Had bread and water for dinner!

5/19/2026

11:40 am

“Xi tells Trump that Putin may regret the Ukraine war”.  This is encouraging news and it holds a secret is that I may soon overcome.

Just stunning.

Started getting back into X and this one was a find.

4:57 pm

Came back from a walk during the heat of the day.  Thought it wouldn’t be that great – but it was – there is something about being in the sun and I gotta do more walks during the middle of the day.  Lately I have been doing them at the end.

8:50 pm

Watched an episode on Netflix had a smoothie. 

Before that went to Trader Joes and got a lot of middle food – sauces, carrot juice small stuff that I have been going without for too long.

Had a curry sauce with bread for dinner.

As I browse Instagram and look at people that I have known in the past, doing really well and I consider myself right now, there is definitely a big difference.  But I know that things will change for me in the future and the divide will be bridged.  The catchup….

5/21/2026

7:29 am

For the second morning in a row I am getting dreams about applying for a position.  Last morning it was at TI as an MSP430 engineer (with my last boss Josh helping me).  This morning it was a Lead Ground Investigator that was already a done deal just choose the seniority.

My fit stats improved this morning. For a second morning in a row I am getting 90% high readiness.  HRV is at an all-time high.

2:19 pm

Woke from my like third nap today.  The last one I was up for a few minutes and checked on YouTube and was really tired, exhausted afterwards.

The tiredness, lack of things to do is really causing me to go into this loop of sleeping.  And I have to admit this time it is too much.  Too much without and too much with it. 

This day had a good start but it has not continued like that.

I want to go walking but I need to take a shower.

6:49 pm

Closed my eyes on the trail and saw a familiar long concrete room. I sank into a tunnel.  Then to the right there was a tunnel to outside! That was partially blocked by stones.  This seems to indicate I am near coming out.

Then some time later I felt like this evening could be a special night.

Also one vision had a cross in the long concrete room.

5/22/2026

10:11 am

Got up at 7 am.  The stats were still good.  Started watching YouTube.  Remembered something about Salla that I wanted to check out and watched it for over an hour.

The show was about the DUMB bases beneath Iran and how the Earth Alliance is wiping them out with tac nukes.

Thinking about going shopping at Walmart but making rice right now since I am unusually hungry for the morning.

No longer believe the YT guy that Aliens are fallen angels.  Largely believe what the aliens say.

Have been questioning if Trump is deep state.  Guides say not but I think he is.

11:26 am

Had lunch.  Before that watched a video from Liana about how a special person is getting brought up in exclusive meeting rooms.  Some people are trying to contact me desperately before I go public. Some groups will want me to make agreements that will mainly benefit them.

I am sure she was talking about me.  She brings up this summer that it will not be a normal summer. Something I have been told personally and from different channelers.

Before the lunch as I was watching Salla, I asked for energy.  Got some dark from below air energy and it was pretty good.  The guilt is wearing off with me asking for it. 

But this time, the energy maybe was there as long as I was watching the video, afterwards it was gone – something I didn’t expect.

4:40 pm

Just had two videos today, channelers on YT, talk about that your name is in the right rooms.  God just wants to encourage me with that today.

Didn’t want to go walking earlier, but Carny seemed to ask for it.  When was ready God vetoed it.

Imagined this as I was listening to electronic music: A guy is stuck outdoors in a desert for a long time.  Given up hope and waiting the inevitable.  Suddenly a horse runs up to him.  He examines it and wonders what does this mean – where did it come from.
Then in a distance, just barely noticeable, he sees an horseman army coming toward him at full speed.

Times are hard, the lack of things to do, draining periods, lack of interest in things.  The things I love doing (computer, YT, news) happen to drain me.  Waiting for some improvement.  Something to change all of this.

I  was thinking this has been going on for a while, but it really kicked off into high gear just before COVID hit. The milestone that should have defined my life, my guides being in strength to help me, seems to have me having a holding pattern waiting on my life to come back to me.  And it has, in small wins over long periods of time.

These wins are hard to come by and I would have expected to be living my dream life now with new interests, abilities, and circles.

This is inevitable but at what cost to me?

I guess the biggest change lately has been this dark energy – the strength from my guides.  I try to use it when things become hard but it too has its limitations. But apparently this is going to be the defining part of my future as the world leader.

I have been asking for it to come naturally but right now it seems to work only on demand.

I guess the problem is isolation, lack of hobbies or interests – probably nothing new to normal people – I come across these situations on YouTube.

One thing that I am really waiting for is what I call “video” – imagine a live video wall room it has the power to change one’s life – not to mention help one with social content or a job.

As I write this, this is like the third time in a few weeks where I feel that the hand workers are reaching my head region.  Really something that is very new and hopeful.

Imagine walking a what looks like an infinite tight rope only to see the end so close.

5:41 pm

Going walking.

 I realized that overcoming (something that is oh-so important to getting a new life) can happen to a person living as a hermit.

6:32 pm

Salvation, at least for me probably will not come from without but from within and it is important that it happens in that order because there might be no other way.

9:57 pm

I have been laying down and reflecting.

I have been really looking forward to getting taken in my past writings here.  But it has become clear to me that the first attempt was really an enemy that wanted to take me from this world and God stepped in and stopped it.  The threat was real and I thought all along it was coming from a friend when it was a foe.

What I am referring to is an alien federation of planets (not white or black but gray) that has been wiping out the dark forces in the galaxy saw me as a threat and was going after me.  God saved me.

This second time I was also looking at it with rosy colored glasses.  Let’s examine it.

For someone to take you without your permission means they are breaking the law.  Government probably doesn’t have the programs for that or cares.  Civilian groups wouldn’t risk the criminal penalty.

I had a dream recently that I was taken, by what appeared as a government program, but there was no coming back from that taking.  This is likely true in any scenario for if you come back you can incriminate them.

Yes the channelers have been alluding to that this may happen.  So that will have to be considered in the long run – but they have been wrong in the past on their timings or if something even happens.

So say there is no taking.  I will have to pick myself by my bootstraps here.  Find a source of income to stay independent.  This needs to be prayed over and I just started. 

5/23/2026

8:04 am

Woke up before 6 am this morning an almost could not fall back asleep.  Something new.  Stats went backwards, with 60 readiness instead of the 90 that I got the past couple mornings and 30 for HRV instead of 32 or 35.

The voices want me to believe that I will be missing.  There are pros and cons to this.  But we will see.  I don’t think it will be an enemy galactic federation of worlds (GFW) doing it this time more like allies.  Even God is supporting this.

8:42 am

I am continuing to lose weight.  Yesterday, before I weighed myself, I thought surely it will go up several pounds because I got some good food at Trader Joes and have been enjoying it the last couple of days.  No – it went down several pounds more to 235.

I think this is because of the clearing that is happening outside my body and inside – the junk is coming off and so is the weight.

Will this continue indefinitely and the weight return to its before olanzapine levels?  How will I feel mentally?  Will I need to stay on the drug?

9:01 am

Oh well, just weighed myself and I back at 237. Time will tell if this is continuing.

Maybe will go for a walk right now because it will be raining later in the day.

2:51 pm

Had the walk. Came home watched some TV. Made lunch. Mother called and we talked.  Then was a bit tired and went to take a nap.

Woke up and had energy and went to browsing the internet – reading articles about the war in Ukraine, tweets and so on until a few minutes later I was tired and needed to go back to bed because I was just exhausted.

So I asked for energy.  And they channeled it to my heart, a dark air energy and it fixed the problem right away.  It is a dark-air energy and it can work really well.  I had to keep asking them because they can stop it half-way.  Anyways if this continues I plan to go grocery shopping as I need a few items.

4:57 pm

I did not need to lay down since the last post.  The energy provided by mines was enough to keep me up – which is a near miracle – because I was really depleted.

More news on how the Russians are losing the Ukraine war – how Ukrainians are reaching Moscow.

Channelers seem to be upbeat.  Comments desperately claim the good news for themselves. People are suffering. I kind of need it too.

Didn’t go shopping or walking.

6:00 pm

Had an interdimensional sex as a he but at times both as a male and a female. Told it was a mother.  Don’t know anything else about this person.

Considered a YouTube video – but it is not important right now.  Was told to go walking but it is almost too late so plan on staying home.

Don’t have anything to do – watch Netflix – don’t seem to care about this.

6:09 pm

God is telling me that I will get taken and soon. It is for the best.

5/24/2026

10:18 am

So got up this morning – the stats were moderate (60). Wanted to go grocery shopping and then got a desire for clothes so waiting and went to Kohls.  Got three t-shirts and then was led not to grocery shop.

Now had a couple of oranges and going walking.

1:16 pm

Went walking.  Watched a few podcasts along the way.  One of them was a little surprising – if my belief if true.

Someone had Seema do a 1-1 reading – taped.  She thought that it may be of use to others and released it to all.

The reading was about someone asking if they should start a YouTube channel or pursue a twin-flame.  Their partner is a mirror of them, just like them, they don’t know they are being considered for a partner role.  She was giving all of this advice.  I kept thinking is there any point in watching someone else’s reading.

But I was told to value this.  This 30 minute reading goes into things like their prospective partner and them will be in headlines.  And I thought this is sounding familiar – Seema was saying these things about me.

Then it hit me.  What is someone is doing a reading about me?  Then obviously this would be very important to watch.

I did watch it the whole way.  I am told someone is considering me and waiting until the right time to approach.  Could this have been them?

1:41 pm

As I sit here, taking time to reflect on what I watched on the channelers today – there were these messages. One from a new channeler, very small following – but about me saying that: “Eye has not seen, ear hasn’t heard – you have been waiting for this your entire life” saying giddily about how good things are going to get.  With emotion.  Thanking me that I chose to come here, that I was brave enough and that I didn’t give up.

Another titled: This Giant is coming down today – this is what overcoming’s are made of.  Another that I have mentioned earlier. Another that there is very spicy air-atmosphere and she has been hearing X-rated stuff that she can’t talk about.

2:01 pm

I was thinking how God is responsible for my victories and accomplishments.  My ego wants to say that it was by my strength.  But there are some things only God can do.  The strength that I do things with is not even my own – the Bible says that in Revelations.  It is humbling to accept that.

2:43 pm

Sitting here and thinking about things and what to do or where to go.

Felt tired and asked for energy.  It arrived and I started to wonder if this is what I should be doing.

After a while, usually, asking for energy doesn’t work – like something is blocking it.  What is it?  God? Holy Spirit? Or some enemy?  I am told it is the Holy Spirit.  Okay that can make sense as in the Bible he is labeled as the restrainer of the Antichrist – until due time.

The energy was enough to keep me from taking a nap.

3:18 pm

Started to try to counter the force that is stopping this energy.  Right now it is getting a lot of it with a little for me.

Just remembered one time in Tulsa at a prayer meeting and saw a small, bulky angel reflecting the dark energy coming (probably from me) away from the audience.  If these are angels that are stopping this energy than it is game over but it may not.

I tried to fight back against the restrainer and was shown a glistening, almost crystal sword filled with light.  It is clear the restraining is coming from heaven.  This energy has the potential to change my life – maybe in not a good way.  Started wilting, with the loss of energy and asked for it and received it.  It is/was flowing just enough so I don’t have to take a nap.  Dealing with big stuff here.

4:18 pm

It seems that in the past the energy to break generational curses was gotten through food and sleeping.  I was kind of a bright, light being. If this new trend continues with me getting dark energy then I might transition to a dark being.  Is this the best way?  I was on the fence about this but the dark energy really helps.

Earlier saw a sack of dark cloths being dumped over my head. I guess my desire and battle to get dark energy must have upset the angels and they are like be careful what you wish for.

5:21 pm

Came across an ad for “dark energy” solutions for AI companies and AI datacenters.  Claims that it has the potential to reach $10 trillion market cap. Elon uses it at his xAI datacenters.

Turns out it is simply methane powered turbines and are behind-the-meter energy.

Digging further into when the term “dark energy” started to get used: it originated early this year (2026) with the company to invest in published a paper on May 6th – the same day that I had the first my own “dark energy” experience. Is this a coincidence?  Could this be something that mines were working on expecting that I would come across it on that day? I am leaning there.

The $10 trillion market cap maybe a good estimate of the Antichrist’s future companies net-worth.

The company behind the ads is Altimetry.

6:12 pm

Reading A gift from the Stars by Elena and it is okay.

But I just wanted to say that I asked mines to fill my down time for a while.  Thinking of this as an eventful energy instead of the “Dark Energy” they provide.  So far just the book which was obvious – but it would be nice to be happily busy.

5/25/2026

7:37 am

A decent morning so far.  Looking for things to do.

9:39 am

Decided to not go shopping and maybe even walking.  It is Memorial Day.

In the desperation for things to do kept asking them to keep me busy and it then progressed to asking them for a life. They seem to be providing now.  Bowed to them.  Seemed to help.

11:47 am

Made lunch and started to reach really harder times – nothing energizing to do. Asked how they could help and they asked for complete control which they got.  Like to believe this is something new but we will see.

12:53 pm

Just going through a withering period – asking for help to make things feel better.

Responded to a chat request on X – probably a scammer but she has not responded back.

2:06 pm

Haven’t had a nap in several days.  But it is really challenging avoiding one due to the lack of energy.  The black energy is getting blocked somehow – in the withering heights.  Not good.

3:39 pm

Faced withering hardships.  Asked for dark energy and it seemed to increase the femininity of me. Went and had interdimensional sex as a female.  This time it was a real male on the other side.  It was heterosexual.  Achieved and felt much better.

5/26/2026

7:56 am

Yesterday was a hard day and new in another. Spent some hard time in boredom so decided to start a chat with someone who messaged me.  Initially they didn’t respond but a few hours later they did.

Thought it would be a scammer maybe.  As we chatted she would show pictures of herself throughout the chat.  First they were her dressed on the bed but then later they were getting racy.

She is from Miami so told me that summers here are bad.  That she was bored and rotting inside.

But then she wanted me to go to her page.  It was only fans. I decided to cut off the communication then.  A few hours later she started chatting again.  This time I went to the page and told her I wasn’t interested: it was porn.  She kept pressing and I left her there again.

Initial feeling of I gotta stop chatting with people from X – that it is a regret.  But today I was thinking maybe there is a positive – I get to chat with someone for a while.  I am not sure on the latter but I am more open to try it although I will try not to – first impressions matter.

8:47 am

Today seems to be a different day.  There is more freedom – in darkness.  Need to go grocery shopping and walking later in the day.

5/27/2026

9:41 am

Yesterday, I chatted with this person from X, watched TV and went walking later in the day.

This person from X restarted a conversation for like the fourth time. I went along with it.  We talked eventually on YouTube and channelers and how I am being talked about there.  Also that I will be an end-time leader.  At which point she or them asked if they could be in my inner-circle. 

I asked if there was someone “pushing” her and she said there might – but in a good way.  The conversation stopped there.

I don’t need to go shopping today, Costco can wait a few more days.

1:22 pm

Came back from a walk. Some of it was cool other kind of hot. I was without water – but that was only noticeable toward the very end.

5:13 pm

Came back from Walmart, got a lot of things that I was putting off. Kitchen, dress stuff. Was craving some dessert there but was told not to get it. So got a watermelon instead.

Came back home and I’m laying in bed listening to music. Probably will have dinner and watch TV.

6:45 pm

Freya in her last post talked about me being sensitive to Earth’s spiritual tectonic plates.  That is important because I was really active in posting to my diary around early May. At one point I mentioned personal plates being removed.  Was the great writing that I had been doing everyday been because Earth’s energy field was flaring up?  I think so, especially since at one point I actually mentioned my own tectonic plates being moved.

She also said that I would move in about 10 weeks’ time to a place that would be more active with this Earth’s spiritual tectonic plates. This place would benefit me with a community and I would be a gift to them.

The conversation with Lara restarted after the walk and then I paused it.  I don’t want to impose or take too much of her time or treat her more than a friend.  So I left it there. 

5/28/2026

3:25 pm

So it seems the last Xer has left me and it is a good riddance. 

Pretty much napped until now.  Nothing to do, maybe feeling tired and I just stayed in bed. Didn’t want to ask for energy because that can be a struggle.

Had a dream last time.  I was in class but still struggling with the schedule and when my next class is going to be at. At one point I was struggling to find it.  Going online and all.

I planned to be successful this time and not forget it.  Left books behind in class – I know weird but I think the professor wanted it.

I decided to ask AI for help with certain things but had a hard time articulating myself properly.

Wanted to catch up on people that had HIV after x amount of years to see if they were still alive.

I heard that some people were hiding their YouTube videos because students would search by their names in class and they didn’t want that.  I planned on hiding mines but God told me no.

Raining now pretty good which is rare so I don’t know if I can go walking today.

4:47 pm

Laid in bed until now thinking.  Making buckwheat with salad for dinner.

Soon strength, God is saying, and that is coming. I am thinking of the ten week timeline given by Freya where I am supposed to move again.

5:20 pm

People, car, houses and money are coming but these things are not the main reward.  The internal victory is.

6:09 pm

Had dinner.  Sitting here thinking of past workplaces, good bosses and some cringe moments.

I remember telling someone that I have no kids – but I might.

7:16 pm

Sitting and reading articles about Thiel and his relocation to Argentina.  He talks a lot about the Antichrist.  And it got me thinking why the AC chose to become an Arab?  Of all races but there will be one or many.

God is asking me to write a lot today.  I wondered if I should return to YouTube and I would be interested, if only I had important things to say.  Also without that, it might affect my development.

8:17 pm

Was laying bed, resting and thinking about Thiel and if he has anything to do with me.  Don’t think so.

The channelers are seeing very significant things ahead.  The Chosen One Ministries, the guy was balling the whole time, tears of joy about what is coming for me.  A new German woman also saw something very significant.

9:46 pm

Watched a channeler talk about not being bitter to people who have hurt you come back into your life when you are on the up and up.  I found I have a hard time with the alien-galactic-alliance (GFW) that wanted to take me out in 2016 and also later in 2021 – as we have to kill the beast before it hatches.  I expect to meet them in the future and I think they will not mention their previous intentions and expect to behave like nothing ever happened.  So I was dealing with some bitterness there.  Maybe time will heal those wounds.

Saw a close manifestation of video just recently and feeling clearing happen.  Some days you are pressing against the generational curses and other days they are being broken.

5/29/2026

9:32 am

Bezos rocket exploded on stand during hot fire test.  Really bad for the company and others. 

Work on by the workers is making me tempted to do a DO as a female.

11:11 am

Had a DO as a female heterosexually.  Had some early life changing moments.

Took a shower and went to do laundry, where I am now

This is a second time, maybe a new trend.

Don’t think it was with a person, most likely a worker – theirs.

2:07 pm

Had brown rice vegetable soup – new and really good.

Watched Alana and she had a sobering channeling message: something out of my fantasy will come but I will be torn and sad about losing the past.  Marriage or something like that.  I don’t really think I can handle a marriage.  Hope that it’s not it.

God was been nagging me about a future offer that I need to accept – he really wants me to accept it.  I will go through a dark time but there will be an ending.

For a second there the workers working on my female sexual organs tempted me to do a another DO.  But it was fleeting.  But it still surprises me that I can do another one so soon after the last one.  Usually it hasn’t been that way in the past.

3:15 pm

Had another DO as a female heterosexually.  Both of these were good today.  Two of them is exceedingly rare.  May go back to 2013-2016 days for the last one to happen like that.

The workers are the ones stoking the fire.

6:18 pm

Had a third DO today.  Same as the others – as a female – requested by the workers.  This time the partner, a male, I think was a man from somewhere in the world.  I was exhausted but managed it.

Had dinner, potatoes with salad.  First time salad in a long time.

7:20 pm

Watched a bit of cable news – got tired of it.  Then went to Netflix but the show I was watching was getting grotesque so  I quit it.  Like the 5th TV show that I could not finish.

I have been getting told this a lot during DOs by God.  I am a lost person.  Trapped in something that I will never get out of. Something a soul is trapped in eternally – there is no way out.  I don’t feel like I am trapped but I am told I am.

The song Here With Me by Matt Fax describes the situation perfectly – except unlike the singer I don’t see it.

I was told it happened during one of my Dos but now I remember a vision and it may go back until ~2001.  Maybe even earlier than that a few years.

Serious thing – but again I don’t feel like I am trapped but maybe it is showing up as other symptoms that I don’t recognize as coming from it.

Three Dos in a day – must be a lifetime record. 

8:09 pm

Watching channelers talking about me.  Traveling, Cars, airports the wait is over! There is so much being told about me – it is like a majestic whirlwind my life and what I am coming into.

I brought back AI – I kind of knew it that it is the Beast system.

5/30/2026

4:09 pm

A day went by.  Tiredness, rested briefly, had a good lunch, got a call from Mother, but it seems a lot of videos stressing that something big is around the corner.

God is pushing that I will get confined the next month – and the next month June is big for me.  The karma is ending and just unexpected stuff is coming.

Just big messages from my key channelers right now. 

4:41 pm

Continuing sitting here and thinking.  The psych appointment is coming and the conversation that will have to happen.

Don’t have anything to do and need to fill the rest of the evening. Guess it will go like things always do – just one minute at a time.

6:01 pm

The channelers words are just getting better.  After the last one, I felt like the month of June holds something for me that people will reach out to me and say congratulations!  Like a person is getting a job on LinkedIn and this is what people are reaching out to tell him this.

I can almost feel the relief of having made it.  It is not that far away – manageable.

I think I will have a first one there and it what may set off the storm or something more than that.

“Soon have limousine”!

6:25 pm

Had sweet potatoes for dinner.  Making large portions and I want my weight to go down is probably not helping but I don’t want to be hungry which happens from time to time.

God is proposing a one with the same sex.  This is a turn off to me.  I prefer women.  But in the past there have been men that I was open to this and they were quality ones, politicians that I was told this would happen with and so on.  The generic man is a non-starter with me.  But it will start off with a woman.

The Beast rises. 

8:16 pm

Watched a traumatic YouTube video of crocodile killing a cheetah.  Then saw an elephant killing a crocodile.  Dog eat dog world out there.

Thinking through the things said about me and whether I will get publicity in June.  If not then by the end of the summer I think.

10:05 pm

So June is bringing restoration, water in a desert, relationships, ministry, unreal reality and also monetary blessings. The desert will bloom in June.  I have spoken a lot like being in a desert.

5/31/2026

9:08 am

Calls. Silence.  What will happen next and where will I be.  God is, unsolicited, is telling me that I will be taken.  This is after me trying to make this go away.

Will it be in June?  Either way something big is happening in June.  I just hope it won’t be the main reason is behind what the takers do.

Burning out Karma is really awesome.  Life break through to you.  Visions appear in front of you.

Just came back from Trader Joe’s and bought a lot of the necessities and good stuff.  Made pancakes with maple syrup- the first time this year.

Planning on going walking this morning.

5:07 pm

Had the walk – kind of hard in the sun and it was humid. 

Had a nap I think. Watched a YouTube channeler.

Posted twice on X one went really high view counts – kind of gave me anxiety – it was about my experience with YouTube TV and Netflix.

Had pancakes again as a snack and again craving them.  Got to have a proper dinner.

6:51 pm

Making potatoes and brussels sprouts for dinner.  Watched some CNN and Fox – not much interesting programming on Sunday night.